"Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep, really to sleep. Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell. And when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough."
I’m sure you do. It sucks. Take care of yourself. Imagine the amount of energy and emotion you could put into yourself and into someone wants it but you decide to keep dumping it into someone who doesn’t treat you like gold.